The squad gathered in the team room (Bar) to discuss tactics, recall previous games and most importantly verbally abuse each other to the point where very few were on speaking terms by the time they took to the pitch.

The Visitors from Stanford Le Hope arrived, disguised as a “well oiled” military machine. Their fitness levels and preparation so impressive that many could have been mistaken for much younger men!!!

Gordano unveiled their secret weapon, Lenny! His perfect looks meaning that several of the visitors couldn’t concentrate on the matter in hand.

The Sharks however were now getting nervous, not only had many of them not put their boots on in anger for several years but their most experienced and dynamic player Dan Liddeatt had failed to show. How would they manage without him? Hughesy calmed the nerves by reminding us all that Dan had actually never really played for us, he just pretends he did!

Skipper GT promised not to cry if we lost and the preparation was complete.

The visitors kicked off. Slappy fielded it and passed to Leaker, the scrum half set the tone and hoofed the ball straight down the pitch. Cheered on by the large vociferous crowd the Gordano Juggernaught chugged down the pitch in pursuit.

The Gordano tight five took control with the slender frames of Colesy, Gambie, Pops, Rollings and Winward working like donkeys for the recently Welsh qualified back row of Martin, Hughes and Richards rampaging with ball in hand. After 15 minutes when the tank was empty the bench provided the fuel with Colesy's Little brother, Blackman, Beacham, Critch and the pocket rocket that is Steerey.

Rich Wall also joined the fray but appeared a tad confused when his first act was to take out our slender inside centre Beaker. The centre partnership now struggling as the ever young Lee Jones had already left the field with something in his shoe.

In times of adversity its important that leaders emerge and thankfully “The mighty Combe” had released Walders to calm the nerves. Nick was able to leave his triathlon induced midlife crisis behind and went on to put in a display that belied his total lack of ability at 10.

Assisted by the speed of Coxy, Randell, Lenny and the mobile Hairdresser that is “no hands” O’Hare the result was surely never in doubt. The wag that commented “If this game didn’t involve catching that back 3 would be unstoppable” was quickly shouted down by Somerset Hughes who knew only too well how they were feeling.

Gordano turned around 20 nil up. Great tries from Walrond, Davies, Leonard and O’Hare the result of Gordano pressure and 3 previous nights in Weston for the Cockneys.

Leaker had left his kicking boots at home and instead wore Lee Palmers, A decision he was later to regret.

James the Stanford skipper rallied his team at half time, he knew that the right words would motivate his side to better things. They watched as he emptied his soul and stomach and pinned their colours to the mast.

Stanford enjoyed the 3rd quarter and played some great rugby, resulting in two converted tries, if they are reading this please believe me as I have no doubt that few of you will remember.

Steve Gazzard was officious as ever and used the opportunity to recall all the personal grudges he has held with the Gordano players for so many years. Have cards will flash them appears to be his motto. Peterson though refused the invite!

Gordano decided to change gear and dropped down from second to first for the last quarter. Two converted Tries followed for Walrond and Martin.

Final score then Gordano 34 Stanford Le Hope 14

After relaxing in Gordano’s newly installed luxury spa facility and state of the art ice showers the teams continued the celebration in the clubhouse.

Thanks goes to all the supporters who cheered us on, Steve for running the whistle, Dennis and James for organising the Stanford boys and to all the Vets that turned up to play.

We look forward to next time.